The Mental Load
The mental load is the invisible, never-ending work of remembering, planning and noticing everything a household and family needs.
It is knowing the nappies are running low, whose shoes no longer fit, when the form is due, and what everyone will eat on Thursday. None of it appears on a to-do list, none of it switches off, and nobody sees it.
It is not the tasks that flatten you, it is being the one who has to hold all of them in your head, forever, without anyone asking. It usually falls on one person, the default parent, which is exactly why it is so exhausting.
Common questions
What is the mental load?
The mental load is the invisible work of remembering, planning and noticing everything a family needs, from when forms are due to what everyone will eat. None of it appears on a to-do list and nobody sees it.
Why is the mental load so exhausting?
Because you can be sitting still and still be working, running the household database in your head while everyone assumes you are relaxing, with no point where it switches off.